Well, being 18, one year older than I was yesterday, doesn't feel any different. As I was driving home from youth group the other night though, I was slammed with a thought that made me question my entire existence. What have a done to make a difference in the last seventeen years? I know I've been there for people, and I might have saved someone's life once or twice, but what have I really done to impact others? God wants to use us all for the glory of his will, but many times we are too stubborn or prideful to listen and obey, to be the salt and the light God longs for us to be.
Matthew 5:13-16
says,
"You are the salt of the earth. But if the salt loses its saltiness, how can it be made salty again? It is no longer good for anything, except to be thrown out and trampled by men. You are the light of the world. A city on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house. In the same way, let your light shine before men, that they may see your good deeds and praise your Father in heaven."
I've had these verses memorized my entire life, and I finally took it to heart after 17 years and 365 days. How sad. I've really tried hard to exemplify Christ in my life to others, but there has almost always been an ulterior motive to it. "I want to look good to my bad friends, I want to be different from everyone else, or I just don't want to get in trouble so I'm going to be the Christian kid who never does anything wrong. I want to make everyone think I'm perfect." I don't know if (before this year) I have ever had the right kind of thinking about why I should try to be a good example. I should be good not only because it pleases God but because I want to draw others closer to him through my attitude about life. This is something I need to continue working on…striving to seduce others to know my Savior because of the amazing things he has done for me in my life and he wants to do in theirs. And the only way I can convince them of this is by showing them, by the way I live my life and treat others around me—they have to be able to see something different in me to make them want to know why I live my life that way. Let's face it; the world is a horrible place, full of corruption and wickedness. So why is it so hard for us to step out and be different? For me really it is because of laziness and selfishness, a fact that I claim to hate yet really do nothing to change. Something else I also hate. I am so horrible when it comes to stepping out of my comfort zone and actually going out of my way to show I am a Christian. I want to be genuine about it; some Christians are so fake it drives me nuts! So how can we separate just making ourselves look good between only using the good behavior to glorify God and witness to others? I think it all starts with prayer. Something I learned in Mexico is that we pray not only to get God's attention but also to focus ourselves and to involve God in our lives. If Christ is the foundation of anything we want to accomplish, he will see that it happens according to his will. So therefore according to this theory, if we pray that God would be the center of our lives and shine through us, I don't see why he wouldn't. So how do we become the salt and light God has ordained us to be? In
2 Corinthians 3:18
Paul says,
"And we, who with unveiled faces, all reflect the Lord's glory, are being transformed into his likeness with ever increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit."
Every day God is making us look more like him, but it's easier for this to happen if we pray about it and use the opportunities we are given. We need to pray that God would govern our lives and then we need to act upon it—whatever God is calling us to do we need to do it with the right attitude….plain and simple. This is something I also struggle with (what don't I struggle with?) and need to continue praying about. Praying that God would completely rule over my life, that I would be attuned to the Spirit and willing to follow him and that I would be a light in the darkness and glorify him no matter what. He will do the rest.
Watch. Pray. Learn. Grow.
