Wow, where to begin? I guess I will just start where the last post left off and catch you up as much as I can. The first month and a half of school was super tough. I had a hard time with balancing everything I needed to get done, and I had a pretty bad attitude concerning everything. Granted, some of the complaints were merited, but I should have risen above the situations and the trials. God gave me grace and mercy, and he really helped me fall in love with the school the second month I was there. After awhile, the rules weren't so bad, and I started having a really good time. I learned to take everything in stride and to not take things personally, which really helped me get along with most of the people I was around. I was still extremely busy, but because of my wonderful friends and their encouragement, the little things didn't bother me as much. About two weeks before Thanksgiving, my friend Nicole received a call from her Mom that her uncle died. She was torn apart, and as we sat in the stairwell morning the loss of her uncle, I remember thinking that I would completely lose it if one of my uncles died. That Thursday, I received the most unexpected call of my life; my Uncle Steve died. For about the next week, I can't remember anything. I know I went to classes, failed quizzes, and cried myself to sleep every night. I tried my best to keep up with everything as I waited for almost a week to come home, but the whole situation didn't even seem real to me. I was scared to go home, because I knew I would have to finally deal with it all, but I also knew I had to be there for my family as well. I was in Indy for four days, and I hated explaining why I was there and not at school to everyone I came into contact with. I hated the small talk that I had to make with everyone at the funeral about school, the rules there, and Florida weather. It was nice seeing my family and friends, but then I was dreading going back to school. I was so far behind, and it took me almost the rest of the semester to catch up. Friends and the people at school were so great when I came back, helping me in any way they possible could. The last four weeks of school were great! I got to spend Thanksgiving Day in the E.R. with one of my friends (I got demerits for that), we had so many parties on our floor, I broke several rules and had a great time doing so, and I also think I overdosed on caffeine. All in all, I had a great first semester, and I ended it all with a 3.7 GPA (thank you Jesus!). Most importantly though, I made some amazing lifelong friends, I grew up a little bit more, and I gained a great deal of spiritual knowledge and insight. I really didn't want to leave school 5 weeks ago, I just wanted you all to come down and visit me there!
So I've been home for five weeks, and what have I done? I bought a guitar the first week I was home, and I've played it till 3 am almost every morning (Nicole's roommate Lorena taught me how to play). I worked at DQ only twice while I was home, but I went to the hospital to volunteer every Thursday. I went to some Bible Bowl activities, had fun at Christmas, spent time with friends and family, caught up on sleep, and was pretty much a bum for the entire break.
So what's in my future? Well, I am getting on a plane to go back to Pensacola tomorrow afternoon, ready to start my second semester of my freshman year. I am happy and sad, excited and nervous, enthusiastic and depressed…basically any two antonyms you could think of. I am so thankful for this opportunity to go back to PCC and continue my education, I know several friends who cannot come back because of finances or family issues. This semester is going to be more difficult in some ways; the classes will be more complex, the teachers will expect more, I am depending on a loan from my parents to get me through, and the four months will probably feel longer. In other ways it will be easier though; I am not working (praise God!), I know what to expect, and I know I have amazing friends that will make it all the more wonderful! I know that I will have to work very hard, but I am ready for it. I need to put away my pride, and I need to totally rely on God to supply all my needs.
What is the biggest lesson I've learned through all this? Psalms 27:14 says, "Wait on the Lord: be of good courage, and he shall strengthen thine heart: wait, I say, on the Lord." And I am sure He is going to give me many opportunities this semester to put that verse into practice ;)
